Letter Home

Dear Mom and Praxis,

It has been three weeks since I left on rotation to my breeder. I am sorry it has taken me so long to write you, but to be fair you only taught me to read and forgot all about the writing part. I will bring you up to date on what has been happening in my life, but I think you’d better sit down first.

I’m doing pretty well now. The broken leg and concussion I sustained after jumping out the car window to chase a squirrel has pretty much healed. I only spent a weekend at the vet and now I can almost walk in a straight line again and I only see birds flying in circles a few times a day. Fortunately, my mad dash was witnessed by a cute blonde who is twice my age. She thinks I'm a stud and has been licking my wounds like a perfect nurse. She even invited me home to sleep in the crate next to her. She is a gorgeous girl, but so are all the women here. Is it weird that I love them and yet I’m related to most of them? Yesterday, I asked her to marry me but she said it was just puppy love. At least I tried to make an honest woman of her before she starts to show. Her last mate lives out on the porch and might be the real father or maybe it's this other stud I met out in the yard today. Anyway, it doesn't really matter since she plans to sell all the children, just like she did with her last 20. Sorry Prax, I know you would've loved being an Uncle.

Now that I've brought you up to speed, I want to tell you that there was no squirrel, I did not break my leg, I was not at the vet, and I’m not going to be a father (although fingers crossed there will be puppies here soon). However, there are several stunning temptresses here who are driving my teenage boy hormones crazy and rendering me a howling fool - literally. I just wanted you to see this indiscretion with the proper perspective and understand that a guy can only take so much rejection, so… SURPRISE I’ll be waiting on your doorstep come Monday.

Oh yeah and with all that other guide dog stuff that doesn't have to do with girls, I've been a very good boy.

Love,

Merit